In Dreams:
I always start in the house that I live in but it always looks different. Sometimes it’s white and clean and large down the stairs. Other times it’s dingy and the windows are covered with old sheets. In my dreams I’m told I’m gay. I meet black men with diseased daughters that have bumps on their fingers. I hunt down girls that call me in reality late at night and demand that I stop talking to my ex. I see people that I never see and feel repulsed when they touch me. I ride in a magic car with a maniac driving into other cars but we go right through them. I feel awake in my dreams. Men cut me with chainsaws and I can feel it. Marylin Manson stalks me outside of a strip mall but it turns out to be Brian Setzer and he’s quite pleasant. I meet a cat with glowing eyes. In dreams he tells me he loves me and then turns his back. In dreams I get to touch her hair. I’m not awkward and I’m not strange.
In Reality:
I always start in my house and it’s the same. My day starts before dawn and I’m not sure how much longer I can take it. My days don’t vary much. I see the same people. Today I did get to touch her hair. I feel strange and awkward. I am confused and numb. I always feel tired. A continuous loop. He’s never divulged such intimate information.
